Tuesday, August 10, 2010
It’s not a coincidence that between the end of December holidays and Valentine’s Day, known as the “National Break-Up Season”, 25% of people reassess their romantic relationships.
With the amount of advertising going on and information on Google, You’ll think that even the most romantic man could never mess things up. Unfortunately, the reality of the situation is that men constantly mess gifts up for their girlfriends often leaving a sour taste in the relationship.
A bad gift can cause not only unhappiness, but tension, fighting and eventually breakups.
So here we go chaps, these are ten gifts you should never give your girlfriend, no matter how much a point you might want to make.
1. Anything related to Weight loss:
Except your girlfriends is a body builder or has specifically requested an exercise machine, a weight loss tape, or dietbooks, don’t even go there. Any woman will take this as a sign that you think she is too fat. What she’s hearing from you is "In some way, I’m ugly to you." Weight loss gifts can lead down the breakup path.
Unless you know her exact size and measurements, stay away from clothing include lingerie. If it’s too tight, it will make her feel fat and embarrassed. If it’s too big, she will also assume you think she is fat. You can’t win either way, as the linkages to being fat are always there. Even if you got here exact size, you now have to battle with whether you got the right color and size.
3. Sports-based Satellite TV Subscription:
Yes you are a great fan of English FA league, you can watch the rerun of Arsenal playing Chelsea, but what makes you think she will choose the game before a rerun of Desperate House Wife or Ugly Betty. Your girlfriend might not mind watching the match with you, but she doesn’t want you getting her satellite TV loaded up with sports channels for Valentine’s Day. Get something loaded with movie channels.
4. Items wrapped in ring-sized jewelry boxes:
Except you plan to propose, this is a no-no. Anything that comes wrapped in a ring-sized jewelry box should better contain an engagement ring else you will have stirred up the wrong emotions. The moment she sees what’s inside and it’s not a ring, you would have brought out fear and misunderstandings. If you have to give her ring which is not advisable, make sure it’s in a container drastically different from a ring box and avoid kneeling down to present the gift.
5. Cleaning Items:
"Ewww!" Why give her a box of body soap or antiperspirant? Anything that has to do with cleaning is cold, unemotional and basically sends the message: “I thing you are messy, dirty, smelly or unable to maintain a home.” The word here is NEVER!
6. Cheap Perfume:
This is also one of the worst presents a girlfriend can receive. They are quite strong smelling, and revolting at most. If you don’t know what she wears, better ask her first. No woman wants to go out smelling cheap. Worse she will be allergic to the perfume and breakout. She’ll never forgive you and you’ll be out the door in no time.
7. Framed picture of yourself:
OK you feel cool and handsome, she thinks so too, that’s why she tolerates you, but honestly she doesn’t want to build a shrine. Loving yourself is important but do get her what she loves not what you love. It’s all about her.
8. Kitchen Appliances:
E.g. Kettle, cooking set or electric oven. OK so you what her "barefoot, pregnant and cooking", but must you make is so obvious? In this century, women want to feel independent and respected. Kitchen appliances say you are old school.
9. Expired Chocolates:
Chocolates can be a perfect gift; they’re frivolous, fun and beautiful. It shows you are thinking about them but buying chocolate in traffic (go-slow) or the corner supermarket shows no thought or caring went into the gift, and even worse, that the item is cheap and shoddy. They show you don’t care enough and she isn’t worth jack.
10. No Gift:
No excuse for "No Gift" fellas. One of the all time low gifts that a boyfriend can give a girlfriend is forget to buy her a gift and then say in the most "corny" way that she has him. This will anger any girlfriend, and can actually ruin a perfectly good relationship.
The simple guide for picking gifts for your girlfriend is to avoid any gifts that seem to have questionable messages attached to them, unless you are trying to make a point in a not-so-subtle way. So the next time you think of getting a little something for your girlfriend, think again, and do take another female along to choose the gift.
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
I do not mean the title just from religious, but general point of view. Have you considered faith?
Things have barely worked for you. People do things and they succeed, but when you try doing those things they succeed at, you fail. Have you actually tried faith? Do you even know what faith is?
Faith is a state of mind, and you can get your mind to that state, “faith state”. One man that I respect so very much, Napoleon Hill, noted in one of his books that “Faith is the eternal elixir which gives life, power and action to the impulse of thought”. I really wanted to get a good view of what faith is, so I checked an online dictionary and here’s what I got “faith is complete trust or confidence”. Are you thinking what I am thinking? If yes, then you ought to know by now that ‘faith’ can work either for you or against, depending on the path you want it to take. If faith is that thing that gives life, power, and action to thoughts, then you know that faith works directly with your thoughts and if your thought is against you, then faith will most definitely be against you. You may be wondering how your thoughts can work against you, so here’s how it does. If you constantly think of things that are not in your favour, then your thoughts are against you. For example, if you want to start something and you start by thinking you may not succeed at it, your thought is already working against you and you mostly will not succeed at that thing.
The potency of faith is boundless.
Faith is the starting point of all accumulation of riches.
Faith is the starting point of all kinds of successes.
Faith is the known antidote for failure.
And from religious perspective, faith is the basis of all “miracles”, and all mysteries which cannot be analyzed by the rules of science. Faith is the element, the “chemical” which, when mixed with prayer, gives one direct communication with infinite intelligence. Faith is the element which transforms the ordinary vibration of thought, created by the finite mind of man, into the spiritual equivalent.
Can you now feel the power of faith? It works every time, just give it a try.It could be the answer to that throbbing question in your head.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
When you're in a relationship,you should know what your partner can or cannot give.Expecting him to give beyond what he has is stretching his patience and also your boundaries.The resultant effect is that this makes him feel inadequate or lazy.You know he cannot afford a Gucci for now,go for something cheaper.You know he cannot take you to a fancy restaurant,go to a neat and cheaper one.
WANTING HIM TO BE SOMEBODY ELSE
Yes i know you have the picture of your perfect man in your head.If he doesn't fit the mental image of what you carry in your head,please let him go.Don't try to transform him into being that which he is not or you'll only end up eroding his self esteem and making feel inferior,and believe me,you don't want him to feel inferior because that is one sure way of making him withdraw from you.
COMPARING HIM WITH SOMEONE ELSE
This is one quick and sure way of driving away your man.Comparing him with someone else?We men like to feel we are the best in our partners' life,and if somehow,they make us feel we're not,then we interpret it as not loving us.Inasmuch as a whole lot of us will deny this,we have got huge 'Egos' and we don't like it being bruised.
Yes,we like a partner that can stand up for herself,make her point known,refuse to be pushed around,and make us see our wrongs.But we definitely do not like partners that 'nag'.This accounts for the reason why you sometimes go to spend the weekend with your boyfriend,and rather than spent time with you,he spends it with his friends or in a bar.
I know you want to spend quality time with him.You love him so much that you don't want him to leave your sight.But by all means try and control yourself.Following him around,to the club,to the bar with his friends(on guy's night out),to the gym,to the salon.Gosh,you're only going to choke him.We like spending time with the boys,respect that and encourage it (except if he has irresponsible friends).
So he was talking on the phone with a girl,but you said it yourself that he loves you
and shows it too.Why would you allow jealousy cloud your sense of reasoning?Have you considered the possibility of the girl being his cousin or his married friend?Don't get me wrong,it is totally ok to be jealous,but please watch it.Quit the unnecessary questions.Asking about his whereabouts every time he walks in is way overboard.
HAVING MAJOR MOOD SWINGS
It is pretty normal to have mood swings,but believe me,it is annoying when your bad moods outnumber your good moods.Hence,watch it or you just might give us the wrong signal and send us running for cover.
Was this helpful?Drop a line to let me know.You can also contribute to this article.Remember,we just want a better world where love is ubiquitous.
Monday, October 12, 2009
Back in school,i had this girl that really got me going 'wow'.She was everything a man could ever want in a woman.She was smart,brilliant,intelligent,confident,pretty,had good sense of humour,good dress sense.In short,she was just perfect.But situations just couldn't let it last.She broke up with me with sensible reasons.I was shattered.Food became annoying,i talked less,went out less,thought more and if not that i hate crying,would've cried.But i got over her and moved on within a reasonable period.How i did it?
1. I accepted the fact that she was gone
This was the first step to my getting over her.Rather than sit there and hope for her to return,i accepted the fact that she was gone and thought of ways to get over her.
2. I deleted her number from my phone
Even though i still had her number in my head,i deleted it from my phone so i don't get tempted to call.The urges came,but i was able to suppress them because the number wasn't in my phone and i didn't want to dial it.
3. I started going out more
I made sure i had people to go and visit,because each time i am alone,i start thinking about her and i needed to get rid of everything 'HER'.
4. I stopped being friends with her
I couldn't risk feeling pains all over again,so i just stopped being friends with her.
5. I made a list why it was better she left
I made a list of reasons why it was better we broke up.This list helped reduce the pain of not being with her.
These were the steps i took to getting over my ex.I hope they help you too.
If you feel you have tips to add,tips that helped you get over your ex,please feel free to leave a comment.
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
The universe has power.When we were created,the powers were given to us.But the powers work with and only with our thoughts.Yes,our thoughts.The universe is such that if you think of negative things,they are attracted to you,so also if you think of positive things,they are also attracted to you.Let me give you a personal account.
I was holding a glass bulb once,and this thought ran through my head "what if this glass falls and breaks?".Believe me,it was only a split second between my thought and the breaking of the glass bulb.Sometime after that,i was cutting something with a knife and this thought ran through my head "what if this knife cuts me?".Before i finished using the knife,i had to wipe blood of my hand and the floor.I never knew what the problem was then,but looking back now,i know i brought those upon myself just using my thoughts.
Have you not had some negative thoughts in your head that eventually came to pass?Have you also not had positive thoughts in your head that equally came to pass?They are not mere coincidences,they were simply results of your thoughts.
You still don't believe this thing about thoughts bringing things to reality?Take the lives of the great men you know into cognizance.How do they think?Positively or negatively?Do you know Thomas Edison?He was the man that created the light bulb and a host of other inventions.Once in his life time,he was embarking on an experiment and while he was asleep in his house,his lab caught fire.He was called and when he got to the site,he just looked at the damage and a few minutes and went to look for a place to continue his sleep.Now that is positivity.What happened next?The lab he built afterward was far better than the one that got burnt.
Do you know Dr Ben Carson?He's one of the best surgeons in the whole world.He is a positive thinker.He even wrote a book titled 'Think Big'.He believes nothing can ever go wrong and if you look at his life,you'd agree.
Andrew Carnegie,Winston Churchill are great men.You may know their stories and you'd agree with me that they were very successful.The name Carnegie still ring bells.They were positive thinkers.
Just in case you don't know how this works,i'd simplify it illustrating with the magnet.The magnet attracts anything metal to itself right?So,think of your thought as a 'magnet' and the things you think about as 'metals'.If you think of positive things,they are attracted to you because your thought is a magnet and the things you think of are like the metals.So also,if you think of negative things,they are attracted to you.
Many people are facing challenges and do not know how to get themselves out basically because they are having negative thoughts.Many people also are successful because they think positively.The are equipped with the secret.
Positive thinking has helped me alot.Yes,i have and am still applying positive thinking in my life and i am dong well.I am soon going to graduate with a good grade(though i was considered academically dull,even had to repeat twice in secondary school),i already have a job with an oil servicing company,i am intelligent,i am respected by my peers.I just believe nothing can go wrong,and nothing will go wrong.I've got the secret,i've applied it,i have given it to you,please make use of it and you will be grateful you did.
All you need do is think positively.But in case you don't know how to do this,you can use these techniques;
1. Everytime you are faced with a challenge,rather than think you can't get out of it,visualize yourself being free from the challenge.
2. You can even write positive things down on pieces of papers and take them with you everywhere you go.Read them anytime you have the opportunity.
3. Always tell yourself you can do it.
4. Look into the mirror everyday and tell yourself beautiful things,positive things.
If you can do all or some of these,then positive thinking would be a part of you in no time.
If you have contributions or comments,i am always delighted to have them.Feel free to leave comments.
Monday, October 5, 2009
You can't get people to believe in you when you don't believe in yourself.Picture yourself as a commodity.Whatsoever price you place on yourself is what people will pay for.
If you price yourself high,people will pay high for you,if you price yourself low,people will price you low.You may be a good worker who puts in his all into his work,
but don't get important assignments entrusted to you.The problem is simply because you make people lack the trust that will make them assign important tasks to you.
When i was younger,i had this same problem.I lacked complete trust in myself and my capabilities.As a result,i became withdrawn and inferiority complex set in.
I would know something but not believing i know it will refuse to speak out.People never bothered asking me things because they felt i wouldn't know.
But when i started believing in myself,people saw it and started believing in me.Now i am always contacted by the same people who felt i
didn't know for solutions to problems they're facing.The key was so simple that it eluded me.The key was believing in myself and trusting my ability.
Not believing in yourself is more destructive than people talking bad about you because here,people actually see,they need not be told.Why else do you think alot of
writers have put down lines upon lines on this topic?They know the importance of self confidence,believing in ones self.Lack of self confidence can lead to;
1. People not believing in you
2. Achieving little in life
3. Failing even in relationships
This is just to mention a few.The importance and benefits of believing in oneself can indeed never be overemphasized.
Believe in yourself so others will believe in you.
If you have any question,have something to add or think this artiicle has helped you in any way,
feel free to drop a comment.You can even give us personal accounts of yourself where this has been applicable.
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Alot of people get scared of things they ought not to be scared about.They fear taking steps that will usher in a whole new life for them,they fear doing things that will make a huge difference in their lives,they fear a whole lot!But the truth is,they fear the unknown.And the unknown does not exist.
Fear itself is the problem,not even the things you fear.If you can conquer fear,you'd have everything working for you.Fear kills,sometimes,faster than a bullet.Do you want to venture into something completely new?Forget fear and just go ahead.Do you have someone you feel you'd be happy with?Stop thinking and just go ahead and tell them.
The only thing holding you from great achievements is fear.Conquer it then you may have conquered the world.